A few things to vent out

1) So as always, I am getting yelled at and blamed for stuff I didn't even do. Just one phone call from a certain someone (who shall remain anonymous, but most can probably guess) asking for money, and in the next 5 min. my mother's frustrations go toward me and my sisters, yelling and cursing at us because she has no one else to yell at. Well actually she does, but he refuses to yell at him. And as she's yelling and criticizing at me, I smiled the whole time, and even giggled a bit, which made matters worst. But I couldn't help it! Before when these things happened, I would yell back and get so angry. But now, I just find it funny. The whole time she was yelling, I kept thinking "wow! does she really have nothing better to do?!". I saw it coming. Oh when will this ever end?! When will certain people learn to just GROW UP and realize that what they say and do affects others. And that the world does not revolve around them?

I'm at the point now where I just don't care anymore. Caring and reacting angry to all the bs I had to go through, made it even worse. Whatever problems and issues my family has now, I don't want to get involved. I don't even wanna know about it. I spent 21 years living my life being looked down on by them. If anything went bad or wrong, I was always the first person on their mind. And when they found out I did nothing wrong, they all just left it alone as if nothing happened. Maybe that's why my life is so screwed over. Because I allowed them to control it and walk all over me. Well not anymore

2)SO my grandma is trying to fix me up with someone from the Philippines. HECK NO! I am not going to be used just so some guy I don't even know can come here in the States and get citizenship. Ahhhh she keeps pressuring me and telling my cousins to convince me. And now my mom is slowly getting convinced. NO NO NO NO NEVER GONNA HAPPEN is all I can say

3) This is nothing big but as most people know, I love watching korean and taiwanese dramas. But how can I continue to watch if the english subs are taking FOREVER?! It's not the subbers fault I know because it takes a lot of time and effort to sub videos. I'm just getting impatient is all. I'm just getting mad that no one is subbing We Got Married (korean variety show) anymore. Even though the new couples are not as good as the old ones, I still wanna watch! Errrr. Gourmet, subbers stopped because it's a license drama now. So I finished like up to episode 10 or something and thats it. Just when it was getting good, they stopped. You Are My Destiny has around 170 something episodes and only subbed up to 138.

But 2 dramas that I do however enjoy watching and wait for every week are East of Eden and Boys Before Flowers. They're still currently airing but i love them. If you haven't watched them, get going! East of Eden is doing around 50 episodes or so, but its GOOD. Boys Before Flowers, I've seen both the Taiwanese and Japenese Versions. Korean F4 characters are hotter than the other two versions! =)


ANYWAYS... to finish this off, I want to share something I learned today! Found this online:

At times we can feel a sense of loneliness even when we are surrounded by many people. Sri Chinmoy suggests that we feel lonely when use our mind to separate ourselves from other people. It is easy for the mind to be negative and when we are in a negative state of mind our ego comes to the fore, this is when we are likely to feel more lonely. Furthermore loneliness does not help us in any way but only contributes to our unhappiness. The cure for loneliness is to use the qualities of the heart to stop judging things and to cultivate happiness.